Good day :)

Despite being a Monday, today was a great day at work. The morning was spent in surgery and this afternoon I fit some sick patients into my schedule so they could be seen. With each case I am learning that more often than not my diagnosis and treatment plan either perfectly matches that of the other doctors or is pretty darn close, which makes me feel like I really CAN be a good animal doctor :) I ALWAYS double check my diagnosis/treatment with one of them but thats to be expected for a new grad right? I'm learning more each day and feeling more and more comfortable :)

Tomorrow is my day off and I get to spend the whole day with my wonderful husband :) Also this will be our second Tuesday going bowling. We went for the first time in a long time last weekend and had SO much fun, so we decided to go bowling every week and maybe eventually join a couple's bowling league. I'm looking for an adult tap class too to start in the fall. Life in Midland is really falling into place; Thank you God!! :)

A prayer...

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Where do you draw the line?

I am coming to the understanding that no matter what you do, veterinary medicine is a profession that causes the line between career and life to be pretty fuzzy, and this is something I am already struggling with. Where do you draw the line between the importance of your patients and the importance of your family? I really look up to the doctors I work with that bend over backwards for their patients - I have seen them come in on days off and stay until late hours of the night taking emergencies or working to solve the multiple problems one of their patients may have. I greatly admire their compassion and devotion, which along with their incredible expertise and skill, make them wonderful veterinarians. But along with this comes sacrifice in relation to their families and personal time. A LOT of sacrifice. Is this needed in order to be a great veterinarian? Does it make you less of a veterinarian when you want to put your family first? Where do you draw the line, or CAN you even draw the line? I want to be there for my patients more than anything, but I don't know if I can do it at the expense of Steve, our pets and our future child or children (despite this being a LONG way away but still...). I don't think its fair for Steve to be home alone each evening or to have to do all the housework (like he has been doing) because I work late and then am too exhausted when I get home to do anything but eat and sleep. I don't want to be the wife or mother who wasn't there.

Technically Steve and I are still "newlyweds", we haven't even had our first anniversary yet. We have a wonderful marriage that I just want to keep building and enjoying. I want us to be equals in the home and have many many happy times and memories. Can I have this and be a GOOD, caring full time veterinarian? Is it ok to actually take and enjoy a weekend off when you have really sick patients? Do you always have to stay late when an emergency comes in right before close? Or is it ok to send them to the nearest emergency clinic? This particular weekend is a good example: I am supposed to have from noon on Saturday to Monday morning off but one of my puppy patients is really sick with parvovirus and started going downhill this morning. She needs fluids and antibiotics, so I agreed to come in tonight and tomorrow evening to help the doctor on clinic duty this weekend tend to my patient when they bring her in for treatment. I didn't think it was fair to dump it on her when the puppy is technically my patient and therefore my responsibility. But at the same time is this fair to Steve and I b/c now we don't really get a weekend. I fear I will be dealing with situations like this thoroughout my whole career and I hope I can figure out how and where to draw the line so I can put my family first yet still be a good veterinarian. Sigh.....

Job update

So far things with the new job as an official veterinarian have been going well. I am very comfortable with puppy/kitten and adult wellness exams and am quickly gaining confidence in surgery. My lowest confidence level so far has been with sick patients, especially when owners don't have a lot of money to spend on diagnostics. It makes me feel so good when my diagnosis and plan match those of the other doctors! Confidence then gets a +1 :) But it is so difficult when the diagnosis isn't clear and I am not sure what to do, or when I'm dealing with a case that I never had in vet school and then am even more clueless. The doctors I work with are wonderful, especially Sue who has been a guardian angel. She is always there willing to help when I need a consult or a boost of confidence. It makes me feel so good that she and the other doctors have confidence in me and have told me that I'm a very good doctor from what they have seen thusfar. Sue and Janet are especially encouraging, especially when I feel pushed to the max. The question I keep asking myself and God is when the heck my confidence is going to be where it should be. I just don't trust myself like I should, and I'm nervous a lot that I'll get the wrong diagnosis or prescribe the wrong treatment. I am always having to ask the advice of the other doctors, even when they are really busy, for me to feel secure about what I am doing for the patient so I can sleep at night. I'm learning though, and thats what is most important right now I guess, especially since I have only been an official veterinarian for three weeks now :)

pictures

Here goes nothing....

Hello there!
So I've heard about this blog stuff so much I decided to start one of my own. Where to begin.....
I just graduated from vet school at MSU this May and moved to Midland MI with my husband of almost 10 months, our cat Aslan (better known as "smoochman") and our 3 bunnies (Aubrey, Angel, and Ozzie). Midland is small but nice, and so far we are enjoying living here. I am the 5th veterinarian at a local animal clinic and just recently started my job there. I'm enjoying it a lot, the other doctors I work with are great. I do admit my confidence level isn't quite there yet though. It is slowly building each day, I hope it won't be too long before I have more trust in myself and my knowledge. The nice thing is I get to see ALL the bunnies since I'm the only one that has a big interest in rabbit medicine :)
Steve will become a full time student at CMU in August and is currently looking for a job in the graphic design field. He's really good at what he does and I'm sure will have no trouble reaching his goal of doing graphics for movies or videogames.
I'm not sure what else to write at this point, I guess thats all for now....adjusting to life as a full time small animal veterinarian and enjoying spending time with my husband and pets. I'll post some pictures to kick things off....